"Night time frightened me my entire childhood."

I am 64. My father molested me up until I was about 16 years old. 

I can't even remember when it started. Was I just a baby? I really don't know. I just know it happened as far back as I have any memory. 

Night time frightened me my entire childhood. My dad was a pastor of Free Will Baptist churches as long as I can remember in both Ohio and Southwest VA. The Free Will Baptist Church is very strict evangelical Baptist church. You know, no drinking, no music, no TV because it's all evil. 

My Dad died 2 years ago due to Alzheimer's. I never told anyone. I find myself now having nightmares again and wishing I would have said something, especially to him. 

Now I cannot tell this to anyone. It would ruin my brothers, my children, my nieces/nephews lives. None of them had a clue what he did to me. They all love him and think he was the sweetest papaw anyone would ever want.

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